Just a smile will do:::: Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem.

I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I’m cracking a safe.

I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.

Still haven’t decided where to go for Easter -—— The Living Room or The Bedroom

Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.

I don’t think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we’d go from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone

This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog..... we laughed a lot.

Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.

My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.

Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.

I’m so excited -— it’s time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?

I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyarda. I’m getting tired of Los Livingroom.

Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.

Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said “I hope I don’t have the same teacher next year”.... I’m offended.

Thanks RES! Needed that!

now that's funny and mostly true sadly. I hope the kid got grounded from the phone for the bomb threat! lol

All the home schooling talk these days reminds me of something that happened many years ago when our kids were still in school.

A few of us parents were sitting in the stands talking at one of our daughter's million softball games that I have sat through in my life. The subject came up of home schooling your kids. One of the mothers said that she and her husband were seriously looking into doing it with their 4 kids. Her youngest was sitting a couple rows in front of us. She straight faced, turned around and said "Mom, if you teach us at home we will be the dumbest kids in town".

Needless to say it took us a while to stop laughing at her expense.

Curtis